Saturday, January 15, 2011

2011 = bad year?

I don't know why... Once we are stepping towards year 2011, I've been hearing bad news only... Is it a phenomena that 2011 is going to be a bad year?

Before Xmas, one of my best friends got admitted due to IVF complications and stroke, now that she is finally transferred to normal ward. I'm sad to see her current state, the gal who is once very articulate and speaks loudly, now speaks slowly and softly, & at times, speak with no sense... the gal who used to make very big moments, and always got told off to behave more demure like a lady, now need the support of others to move about, this make my heart aches... I rather that she continued to be complaint by us for being " too loud" and " too big movement".

The fact that she is finally pregnant after so many years, may not be a totally good news. The timing just isn't right... Doctor said that it is advisable to abort the baby given her current condition, but... this is so cruel... Everyone are caught in the dilemma, whether to advise her to keep the baby... Given her current condition that she can't move about by herself, it may be tedious for her, and the fact that she is under medication, the baby may be affected as well, but we all know, this baby is so precious to her...

I seriously hope that she can move about by herself soon, though back to her agility may not be possible in the near future... "God", please help her with speedy recovery since you already gifted her the miracle of a baby...

Then, came another piece of news of my friend's 2.5 yr old kid admitted since last week due to bladder retention and serious constipation, with bacteria infection. It got so serious that she can't walk and just today, she went for surgery to remove legion in her spine that is affecting her nerve. And to make it worst, chances of full recovery of her nerve function is only 10-15%. I pray and believe that she will be among the 10-15%.

Also, another close pal of mine who is facing depression, seems to have worsen and it is advised that he should go to Institute of Mental Health (IMH) for consultation; however, he simply refused. To see his condition got worsen and yet I can't do much to help him as he is in a state of self-delusion & self-denial, and shut away from all... I felt so helpless...

At the same time, I saw how his mother suffered from his state of mind and mood swings. I fear that, anytime, this may just trigger her depression that is now under much control.

I already have my own set of problems that I have took so much pain to handle these... And to see my loved ones / friends around me, suffering; I felt much worse...

It's been a long time since I last had a good sleep... as I'm suffering from serious Insomnia for the longest time. Everyday, I need to make myself so tired that I just K.O... I fear that one day, I may just collapse...


  1. Please talk to someone about your problems. Visit my blog if you need recommendations.

  2. Eh kok kok ur head.

    Remember u once wrote this in my blog. Positive attract positive, Negatice attract negative. I believe in this esp what i went thru last year. And the tongue speaks power so you should start saying good things .... the more u say and think about bad things, bad things sure go to u.. Why cos u allow it so.... So start smiling and say: From this moment onwards, this will be a good day :) All gd things will come to me and my surrounding.. Jia you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  3. I totally understand what you mean. I have been suffering from insomnia too. Actually facing some problems recently too.

    Having close one suffering from depression and cannot offer much help is really feeling terrible.

    Oh yes the IVF thing too, wish me luck and I need that now.

    Will contact you after next month when I pass through this tough period, don worry I am fine :)